Hairspray

Every time I hear it, every time I watch you smile,
I feel my color fade to grey; fade away.
I try until my fingers bleed and I found God on the road,
But that road leads me farther and farther away.

In the dim firelight I'd catch your gaze and lose it,
Drop your look and bruise it, but it's alright.
In your sight the lights too bright but the edges blur,
Until you're just a bad taste in my mouth, a dirty word.

~JAD

Your Lipstick and the Long Walk Away

you put your lipstick down as you stepped back from the mirror,
Red, like your heart used to be once upon a time.
Like a fairytale the door closed behind you, shadows once again,
And off you walked in the rain to speak another man's name.

You smile and nod and speak the perfect words,
But your eyes are somewhere else.
Another frigid day in the house of the absurd,
Why will I not burn while all around me melts?

Impossible to stand when the sand beneath you is sinking,
You reach for the noose; it's the only rope in sight.
But you pull yourself up again, not your idea:
Right foot, left foot, after all you've got your orders.


~JAD

Me Against Me

Teeth on the barrel, looking back
All black, just another panic attack.
Now I notice it's all a little off track,
Always me against myself.

I am the enemy, nobody worse
It's perverse the way these thoughts disperse.
Free ride in the back of a hearse,
Always me against myself.

Put me in the ground; move it along.
They said "Be strong" well they were wrong.
Getting impatient for the end of this song,
I was never myself.

~JAD